Think about it. Each Halloween we pulverize pumpkins to stick candles in their hollowed-out gores and put them on our front porch so that people know that we're friendly people with candy.
This ritual also marks the beginning of the most gastronomically wonderful time of year.
How so? Let us count the ways:
Pumpkin Soup (Trust us. So good.)
And of course, America's favorite weird obsession:
The Pumpkin Spice Latte.
We've seen people trample small children to get to this drink. Get it together, people.
If all of these things made you really hungry, but you're still unsure how to get this pumpkin-slaughtering ritual started, here's a little "How-To" from Slacktory: