You know when you have an emotion so powerful inside you that the only way to express it is to break out in song? I do that a lot, and you know what? Nobody around me is happy. I sing about as well as I dance. And this dog dances better than I do.
Lucky for you, my voice had absolutely nothing to do with “Frat House: The Musical,” an awesome new web series that just happens to be one of the winners of this year’s “Subway Fresh Artists™ Featured Filmmakers” competition!
Filmmaking students at USC and NYU—two of the top film schools in America—submitted short films for consideration. Two teams from each school won the top prizes, which means their series are getting the star treatment!
First up is “Frat House The Musical,” the story of a plucky college freshman with pipes of gold and abs of steel.
He wants nothing more than to join his father’s fraternity. Sadly, the Sigma frat doesn’t want him… until they realize they need him to survive. Drama! Dancing! Singing! Subway! What more could you ask for?
For you to watch it.
We're back!
After a short hiatus prompted by the laziness of our editor (ed. note: Sorry, dudes.) "That Ain't Right" returns!
This is where we scan Twitter for people who say "My Damn Channel" but are in no way referring to us! And through much scientific study (ed. note: There was NO scientific study.) we determined that the correct response to each tweet is "That Ain't Right!" Here we go:
@BeccaMathers , you are preaching to the choir. I was having a little trouble trying to fit the phrase “That Ain’t Right” into this because loving Lifetime is oh-so-very-right. Then it dawned on me, “Lifetime is MY damn channel”? Are you planning on taking Lifetime away from us all and depriving us of the sweet combination of Meredith Baxter Birney and reruns of “Unsolved Mysteries”. Take some other channel like Home and Garden or The CW. Not sharing Lifetime with the rest of us? That Ain’t Right!
@obeyMeBitchez , our hearts go out to you, it seems like you are living a nightmare scenario. Anyone who wakes up from a nap to hear Louie Anderson yelling “Top 6 reasons to eat a sandwich!” deserves a hug. To the people who changed @obeyMeBitchez , changing the channel to a show hosted by the son of satan himself, Louie Anderson?!?! That Ain’t Right!
That lil grl better done gone get enough of changing your damn channel! Grl changing your channel! That ain’t right! For real though lil grl, it sounds like you need some guidance. Changing @Caremel_Beautyy ‘s channel is not the answer to solving your problems. If you need some help, we here at MyDamnChannel are more then willing to listen. If you don’t speak out your problems they will grow inside and come out as hate, that simply Ain’t Right.
@lextasy I think you need a new choice of friends. We here at MyDamnChannel are more then willing to step up and apply to take over. Unlike your last friend we are tall and handsome, only sit where we are told and would never in a million years even think of changing your channel. We also are great listeners and make a Tiramisu that is out of this world. Keeping your old and disrespectful friends around? Does he even know what a Tiramisu is? I bet he can’t tell the difference between a Ramekin and a cupcake wrapper! That Ain’t Right!
WHAT!!! @FinesseYoNigga! You have found your own personal version of Airbud! Sure, he may not be able to shoot the game winning 3 pointer or score the game winning touchdown (See “Airbud 2: Golden Receiver”) but he can change a channel! You must find a way to hone his talents otherwise they will go to waste and That Ain’t Right!
That's all for this edition of
"That Ain't Right"! Will there be one more before the end of 2011? (ed. note:
I promise nothing.)
In honor of Veterans Day, we thank all of the men and women who have served to help keep us safe and free.
May you all come home to someone who loves you.
It's also 11/11/11! In honor of this day, we turn to our Spinal Tap brothers and Turn It Up To 11 with our picks for our Top 11 Videos!
If you knew that your best friend/boss/dog had an audition for a Jack Black movie, you would choose immediately to:
A) Stay up all night helping your best friend/boss/dog learn his lines and doing the best Jack Black impersonation you could so your best friend/boss/dog won't be too starstruck when meeting him.
B) Stay up all night discussing how much you hate this new incarnation of Jack Black and you miss all the old "Tenacious D" stuff and then ask your best friend/boss/dog if maybe he could get Jack Black to sign one of your old "Tenacious D" CD's because-- of course-- you still have CD's.
C) Stay up all night throwing your best friend/boss/dog the most righteous party.
The answer is obvious, isn't it?
Watch the episode and see how obvious it is.
And put those Tenacious D CD's away. And don't ever show them to a girl. Seriously.
(L-R: Mitch, Thomas, Jim)
Editor's Note: Today we have guest bloggers! The Worst Generation is our newest series and we thought it might be nice for you to get to know its stars a little more intimately, so here they are:
So, My Damn Channel wants us to do some type of blog thingy to kinda introduce ourselves to the people of the internet. Since we don't have any actual "fan mail" (or even "fans" for that matter), I've ripped off a few questions from a Justin Bieber fan site for us to answer. Answer these bad boys and any other questions you can think of to get this bad boy rollin'.
+++++++++++++++++++
If your house was on fire and you could only take one thing with you what would it be?
- Roxy, 13, Detroit
JIM: Hi Roxy. Thanks for watching. I'd probably have to grab my amazing-incredible-pornography box, a.k.a. my computer. Either that or my collection of Simpsons action figures.
THOMAS: Bauer, he's the only hope any of us have for success. And you're an idiot Jim the question clearly stated one thing that you would take and you clearly listed two.
JIM: I get nervous talking to people from Detroit. She probably just wants to steal our stuff.
MITCH: My depression pills.
Where do you get your best love advice?
- Lonely in Little Rock
MITCH: My dad once told me. "never take home the three legged dog from the pound just because you feel sorry for it." That made since when I was 9 and it still does to this day.
JIM: I've tried it all; tarot cards, gypsy palm readings, fortune cookies, magic 8 balls... and I found the best place for you to get your love advise... is from inside your heart :)
THOMAS: I just watch what Mitch does, and it teaches me exactly what NOT to do as far as love is concerned.
If you could have dinner with 3 people, dead or alive, who would it be?
THOMAS: I don't really care as long as those three people are buying. And it better be some gourmet shit, if I have to go listen to three other people bore me to death I don't want to do it over a Big Mac and fries.
MITCH: Bo Jackson, The Pope, and Dennis Rodman
JIM: Wow Mitch, what are the odds of the Pope even responding to that evite? I'm going with Jenna Jameson, Pamela Anderson and Angelina Jolie. In their primes. Next question.
How does it feel to be mobbed by screaming girls?
JIM: You get used to it.
THOMAS: Feels normal, they've been doing it my whole life.
MITCH: Sometimes, I don't feel worthy of it all. Other times, it gets annoying having to hear all the jibber-jabber that comes along with it.
Describe your dream girl.
MITCH: I hear your dream girl is actually a version of your mother. So probably an annoying old bitch.
JIM: My dream girl is funny, smart, nice smile, pretty eyes, caring of others, and got an ass so big you can see it from the front.
THOMAS: Depends on my mood. And the season.
What would a fan have to do to date you?
THOMAS: Tell me their daddy was Steven Spielberg, Ron Howard, Jerry Bruckheimer or any such type of person, so that I can leave these clowns of TWG behind and get started on my life doing something that is actually worth a shit.
JIM: Be 18 years old and have a vagina. A trust fund wouldn't hurt either.
MITCH: Have you ever heard of a ballcuzzi?
Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
JIM: Hopefully off of unemployment and out of my parents' basement.
MITCH: Cute cottage near the sea with roommates that make me breakfast and flush the toilet once in a while... or unemployed in my parents basement.
THOMAS: Dating Spielberg's daughter.
How do you deal with all the haters out there?
MITCH: I always carry a butterfly knife I got in Baja. Can't hate when you're getting stabbed.
THOMAS: In the words of Tupac: " Fuck it. I feel like I shine. And I don't give a fuck how many white people, the Media, black people, playa haters, police, whoever, try to darken my shine, Im'a always shine through. "
JIM: Uhhhhh wait what?
What would you do if all the fame went away tomorrow?
JIM: If all of this fame was suddenly taken away from me, I'd probably blow my head off.
MITCH: It would be a long way to fall, but I'm sure I could still pull ass so who cares.
THOMAS: Be excited that I'd never have to answer stupid questions like these again. Is this really what you want us to do Jimmy? Whataya' stupid or something?
How would you describe your style?
THOMAS: Lazy
JIM: Oh I dunno, maybe rural-chic with an urban twist.
MITCH: Commando, Ballistic, and Fresh.
How do you maintain such a hot body?
THOMAS: Layers and no AC.
MITCH: Commitment to Excellence.
JIM: More like commitment to purging after every meal. I usually lift like 8 hours a day, 6 days a week.
Editor: Uh, thanks, guys! We'll all be watching you and Bauer every Tuesday at www.MyDamnChannel.com/TheWorstGeneration! And following you on Twitter at @TheWorstGen! And on Facebook at Facebook.com/TheWorstGeneration!
Otherwise we'll be avoiding Mitch and his butterfly knife.
We're premiering a new series tomorrow and this little guy is the star!
We put his picture up on
our Facebook page this morning and as of this writing 29 people have "liked" him and nine different ladies have written some iteration of "AWWWWW. SCHMOOPY. I WANNA HUG HIM AND SQUEEZE HIM AND CALL HIM GEORGE! HE'S SO CUUUUUUUTE!" in the
comments!
This series is going to go over super-well. We can feel it.
(*Actual product will most likely look nothing like this. Also, wings not included.)
Lately, My Damn Channel swag has been flying off the shelves and onto people's bodies at an alarming rate. It seems like everyone wants a new T-shirt in their hands (or on their torso, at least.) After all, who wouldn't want a slice of pie from the larger bakery that is the world of My Damn Channel paraphernalia?
Take My Damn Channel viewser JustNeph... please! When we asked folks to tweet at us with the phrase "I want #MyDamnPen!" Neph responded. And we didn't let his plea fall on deaf ears, hooking him up with not one but TWO My Damn Channel pens, and a MY DAMN CHANNEL STICKER.
And here's our pal Dom Galati donning a sharp new My Damn Channel tee...
And if you want your very own My Damn Channel shirt, you can follow Rocky Rector's example and be the one this week to get the most friends to sign up for our ongoing Versailles sweepstakes. Additional info is here.
Go ahead and sign yourself up, while you're at it. Winner gets a free trip for two to L.A. to meet Versailles (watch it!) co-stars and creators Patricia Heaton and David Hunt. There's only one week left to enter, so if you need to, now would be a good time to buy a working mouse.
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MattheW on 6/3/2011 5:30:00 AM by Matt Warren
Never let it be said that the Night Feed doesn't contain multitudes. Sure, yesterday we told you about Mark Malkoff's quest to turn his doughy flagon of untoned flab into a rockin' six pack, but today we're taking a sharp left turn away from the world of health and fitness to indulge in another one of our not-so-secret passions: donuts!
Chocolate, sprinkles, glazed, old-fashioned... we're not picky; we like them ALL. And today is National Donut Day -- an actual holiday created by the Salvation Army to honor the battlefield nurses of World War I who coaxed injured soldiers back to health via the medium fried dough food (thanks, Wikipedia!).
And you don't need to be a mustachioed beat cop or having a support group meeting in a church basement to eat donuts anymore. Everyone's doing it, including minor local television celebrities like Colin Tickler (David Hunt), son of legendary B-movie actress Evelyn Anders (Patricia Heaton). Here's Colin extracting some donut innards from Episode 3 of the new My Damn Channel series Versailles...
Sexy, right?! We bet introverted "You're In Sports" intern Sara Wolper (Martha MacIsaac) would agree. So throw away your fertility talismans and Axe Body Spray. Show some holiday spirit by rubbing a glazed donut across your bare chest and smearing your face with custard. The Salvation Army demands it.
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Jimmy Fallon on 4/20/2011 8:34:30 AM by DannyMoney
Holla at ya boy DannyMoney, ladies and gents: it's 420 and you know what that means!
So I'm assuming some of y'all will be getting a little silly today? A little goofy? High as a kite? Well if you are, My Damn Channel has a whole bunch of videos - well, the entire site, really! - that'll get you laughing on this special day that comes but once a year (just because YOU celebrate every day doesn't mean it's 420 year round!). Here are a few of my favs:
- Not only is today 420, but a new episode of Gigi: Almost American premiered, which you can watch
RIGHT HERE. I love me some pig dog!
-
HERE'S a wacky video from the master, Andy Milonakis. It never fails to crack me up, mostly because it's so damn idiotic, which I consider possibly the HIGHEST compliment I can give.
- And while you're at it, why not watch the entire 10 episode
series of Horrible People. Sit back and let it ride! This is seriously one of the funniest shows I've ever seen. Probably due to the fact that it was written and directed by A.D. Miles, currently the head writer on The Jimmy Fallon Show.
Word up!
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hollywood on 3/18/2011 9:50:08 AM by Matt Warren
Our pal Josh Gad is, as they say, blowin' up big time, with supporting roles in big-budget
Hollywood melodramas and a co-lead role in the new Broadway hit
The Book of Mormon, the latter of which is currently making the critics swoon, Outer Darkness be damned. And Josh will also be on the Today Show tomorrow morning, Saturday March 19th, to further his Gadian agenda. So set your alarm, wake up early, and tune in to NBC.
If that wasn't enough, Josh is set to unleash the final prong of his multilevel media-domination masterplan next week in the form of Gigi: Almost American, which premieres right here on My Damn Channel next week, starting March 23.
Part Borat, part Latka Gravas, and all Gad, Gigi is the befuddled, accident-prone outsider lurking inside all of us: earnest, well-meaning, and utterly clueless. So stop by next Wednesday, grab a pig dog, roll down your windows, and howl at the moon.