'Chuting!

Now at this point, you may be thinking "WHAT ON EARTH IS CHUTING?!?!"  Webster's dictionary defines chuting as "the act of utilizing a chute (as by passing ore down it)."  But Webster's dictionary is an idiot.

In the 21st century, chuting, invented by Grace Helbig in a recent Daily Grace, is an alternative to planking (pictured above), which is for babies.  Here's two chuters inverted chuting at the American Museum of Natural History.

If you want to see what normal chuting looks like, you could hold your computer upside-down, or keep it rightside-up but look at it while inverted chuting yourself, or build a time machine and travel to 1897 to partake in George M. Stratton's perceptual adaptation experiment, in which participants wore goggles that inverted their vision vertically until their brain eventually inverted the image back to normal, at which point when the subject would remove their googles, their vision would be permanently upside-down.

Or you could check out this photo of a very athletic Darlene Contreras chuting on a soccer ball.

Or Taylor O'Brien 'chuting hoops.

And if you can't get enough of planking variants, check out this brief article from My Damn Chanel Blog Network member The Slacktory.

TGIF, HAGS, and happy 'chutin'!

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Hall Pass Pass

The new Farrelley Bros. comedy Hall Pass was the #1 movie in the country last week, and much of the credit can be placed on the broad, heartland-handsome shoulders of co-star Jason Sudeikis.  Not surprising, as the man’s talents are legion: one-time Blue Man Group wannabe, dater of Hollywood starlets, George Wendt’s nephew, etc.  And don’t sleep on SNL, where he portrays a wide variety of characters ranging from the pathetic to the nettlesome, including one-half of both Jon Bovi, the world’s worst Bon Jovi tribute band, and the titular “Two A-Holes.”

But by far, Sudeikis’s most daunting role to date has been as none other than our very own David Wain, wherein attacks the role of My Damn Channel’s favorite lovelorn man-child with the kind of method intensity not seen since Ben Kingsley cinched up his cloth diaper to play mankind’s other great savior, Mahatma Ghandi.  Maybe this Believer article was the key to his research.  Then again, maybe there’s a little David Wain in all of us (gross).

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Subway, USC, and My Damn Channel

Hey! We're hosting the winners of the Subway Fresh Artists contest in conjuntion with USC. Check out 3 episodes from each winning team. Odds are you'll see/hear these names again since not a year has passed since 1973 without a USC alumnus or alumna being nominated for an Academy Award. Pretty ballin', right?

Do Whatever – A scripted comedy series from Andy Landan, Giles Andrew, and Alice Mathias featuring an overworked junior lawyer who convinces his computer genius friend to quit his job and start a business with him doing jobs that nobody else wants to do.

Jeff and Ravi Fail History – A scripted buddy comedy sci-fi series from R.J. Daniel Hanna,  F. Brian Scolfield and Ian Ward following a jovial slacker and his astrophysicist roommate as they stumble their way from the dawn of man to a post-apocalyptic future in a sputtering time machine.

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ICEMAN CHRONICLES OVER 300,000 VIEWS

You can now see all 6 episodes of Season 1 of "The Iceman Chronicles" here.

We launched one month ago, and the series just passed over 300,000 total views on My Damn Channel and on our syndication network. 

Thanks for the solid start and the feedback. Tell us more: da good, bad, ugly, lovely. 

Happy Friday THANKS to Rachel Webber, Ilsa Berg, Gabe Marano and all connected humans at Fox Television Studios and 15 Gigs for a hot first date.

MEGA THANKS to David Fickas, Brice Beckham, Drama 3/4, and the cast and crew for allowing us to join your world.

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STAT ATTACK

Now more than 500 original My Damn Channel videos.

Keep watching - keep attacking us - you are loved.

Register on our home page in the upper right - it takes a minute. We can email you our new videos directly.

We just passed 44 million views n counting.

More than 47,000 subscribers to our YouTube channel. Sign up here wontcha.

Building a big community on Facebook too - meet & steal friends here wontcha.

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NEW NEW & NEW

We started My Damn Channel in the wake of an earlier round of big corporate layoffs as traditional media tried to wrap its arms around the intense insurgency of online video.

Many major media companies took a shot at chasing YouTube's brass ring, but they couldn't ride their horses fast enough to get into the lead ahead of all the upstart brands racing onto the field.

We ran fast in our first year. Some of our best competitors like Super Deluxe didn't make it. We loved their work.  We stayed determined to keep costs low, but still bring the best talent - treat them well - and let them deliver quality, original web video which is getting seen by an audience growing faster by the second.

In the past 24 hours, we've had the #1 video on all of YouTube - thanks to Big Fat Brain, creators of "You Suck at Photoshop" and their NEW web series, "Agency of Record."

This week, TIME Magazine honored us in their Top 10 Everything of 2008 - twice!  They put YSAP in the Top 10 TV Episodes of the year next to Lost, Mad Men, 30 Rock & Colbert. And they honored Sir Harry Shearer for one of his Katie Couric Open-Mic Moments that we call "Found Objects." 

Maria on our team just told me we passed 42 million total views yesterday.

This week, we added Suhaila Suhimi to lead the advertising team bringing more top brands in to sponsor all of our new programming.

Here's a list of what's NEW & what's coming for the year ahead with immeasurable thanks for every second you've stopped your world to take a look at www.MyDamnChannel.com:



Flight of the Conchords HBO premiere episode next week on My Damn Channel - 3 weeks before it airs on HBO !

STELLA - new channel just launched

GraceNMichelle - new channel just launched

Agency of Record - new episode tmrw/Fri

Heather Fink channel

new episodes of LAPDANCE with KURT LODER

new videos from atom.com

new episodes of BACK ON TOPPS - every Tuesday

new episodes of FACETIME

and a lil tease of more/new magic wonderments:

ED HELMS
KERRI KENNEY-SILVER
SAM SEDER
SARAH SILVERMAN
DAVID CROSS
ANDY DICK
ISLA FISHER
A.D. MILES
MARK MALKOFF
and....

S P I N A L   T A P   2 0 0 9
    

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DON WAS DELIVERS

Don Was                         Todd Snider                      Dock Ellis

Click Don to get the intro.

Click Todd to get the video.

Click Dock to get more.

Experienced an honor & a thrill a few weeks back in LA. Don Was invited me to visit one of his recording sessions at Henson Recording Studios in LA. The Muppets lair is the former home of the old A&M Records. The site was first known as Charlie Chaplin's movie studio at the turn of the last century.

The Wasmopolitan Cavalcade of Recorded Music is the My Damn Channel house that Don Was built. We're incredibly lucky bastards to have this man creating new music for your ears and eyes.

Today's brand new music is featured on our home page is from Todd Snider. If you're uninitiated, get to his music & his live shows.

We're on the road this weekend with Brother Don to film on location at Detroit's Concert of Colors. Check back here this summer for this live music supporting a most worthy event.

If you're in the Detroit area, or can get there - this weekend's shows are all free.

Don Was Detroit Super Session is LIVE this Sunday night at the Max M. Fisher Music Center in Detroit.

7:15 - 8:30 pm

Don Was Detroit Super Session Featuring the house band: Don Was (bass), Luis Rusto (keyboard), Randy Jacobs (guitar), Terry Thunder (percussion), David Was and special guests MC5 guitarist, Wayne Kramer, John Sinclair, Mitch Ryder, Lola Morales, The Muldoons, Sisters Lucas, members of Dirtbombs, Detroit Cobras, Black Bottom Collective, The Ramrods, Black Merda and other very special Detroit Superstars Motor City Rock, Funk, Jazz, Pop, Soul (USA) A once-in-a-lifetime event! Native Detroiter Don Was returns to lead an all-star cast of high-energy, only-in-Detroit talent. Fresh from the recent Was (Not Was) tour, Don Was (aka Don Fagenson) orchestrates a funky, jazzy, rockin’, soulful musical meltdown in historic Orchestra Hall, featuring John Sinclair, Lola Morales and members of Black Bottom Collective, Sisters Lucas, Detroit Cobras, the Dirtbombs and surprise special guests. Was is a master collaborator, best known for producing mega-watt musicians including Bob Dylan, the Rolling Stones, Elton John, Ringo Starr, Brian Wilson and Bonnie Raitt, whose Was-produced Nick of Time scored the 1990 Album of the Year Grammy Award. Was also took home the 1995 Grammy for Producer of the Year. Guaranteed to thrill!

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HERO

Rest in Peace this Father's Day....


BRUCE OFFERS TRIBUTE TO TIM RUSSERT IN CARDIFF

From the stage at Cardiff Millennium Dome Stadium: Saturday June 14.

Introduction before "Thunder Road"

"I'd like to do this tonight for a long time friend of the E Street Band who passed away suddenly.

"Tim Russert was an important unreplacable voice in American journalism. I watched him hold our politicians feet to the fire on many Sunday mornings. He was always a strong voice for honesty and accountability in American government .. but beyond that he was a lovely presence, a good father, husband, and good guy. He was a regular at many E Street Band shows and I'm going to miss looking down and seeing that big smiling face in the crowd.

"We send this out all the way back to the states tonight for his son Luke, his wife Maureen, his dad Big Russ , and all the Russert family.

"Tim , God Bless You, We will miss you..."

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FAREWELL TO DANNY

This eulogy was delivered by Bruce Springsteen at Danny's funeral on April 21 in Red Bank, New Jersey:

FAREWELL TO DANNY



Let me start with the stories.

Back in the days of miracles, the frontier days when "Mad Dog" Lopez and his temper struck fear into the band, small club owners, innocent civilians and all women, children and small animals.

Back in the days when you could still sign your life away on the hood of a parked car in New York City.

Back shortly after a young red-headed accordionist struck gold on the Ted Mack Amateur Hour and he and his mama were sent to Switzerland to show them how it's really done.

Back before beach bums were featured on the cover of Time magazine.

I'm talking about back when the E Street Band was a communist organization! My pal, quiet, shy Dan Federici, was a one-man creator of some of the hairiest circumstances of our 40 year career... And that wasn't easy to do. He had "Mad Dog" Lopez to compete with.... Danny just outlasted him.

Maybe it was the "police riot" in Middletown, New Jersey. A show we were doing to raise bail money for "Mad Log" Lopez who was in jail in Richmond, Virginia, for having an altercation with police officers who we'd aggravated by playing too long. Danny allegedly knocked over our huge Marshall stacks on some of Middletown's finest who had rushed the stage because we broke the law by...playing too long.

As I stood there watching, several police oficers crawled out from underneath the speaker cabinets and rushed away to seek medical attention. Another nice young officer stood in front of me onstage waving his nightstick, poking and calling me nasty names. I looked over to see Danny with a beefy police officer pulling on one arm while Flo Federici, his first wife, pulled on the other, assisting her man in resisting arrest.

A kid leapt from the audience onto the stage, momentarily distracting the beefy officer with the insults of the day. Forever thereafter, "Phantom" Dan Federici slipped into the crowd and disappeared.

A warrant out for his arrest and one month on the lam later, he still hadn't been brought to justice. We hid him in various places but now we had a problem. We had a show coming at Monmouth College. We needed the money and we had to do the gig. We tried a replacement but it didn't work out. So Danny, to all of our admiration, stepped up and said he'd risk his freedom, take the chance and play.

Show night. 2,000 screaming fans in the Monmouth College gym. We had it worked out so Danny would not appear onstage until the moment we started playing. We figured the police who were there to arrest him wouldn't do so onstage during the show and risk starting another riot.

Let me set the scene for you. Danny is hiding, hunkered down in the backseat of a car in the parking lot. At five minutes to eight, our scheduled start time, I go out to whisk him in. I tap on the window.

"Danny, come on, it's time."

I hear back, "I'm not going."

Me: "What do you mean you're not going?"

Danny: "The cops are on the roof of the gym. I've seen them and they're going to nail me the minute I step out of this car."

As I open the door, I realize that Danny has been smoking a little something and had grown rather paranoid. I said, "Dan, there are no cops on the roof."

He says, "Yes, I saw them, I tell you. I'm not coming in."

So I used a procedure I'd call on often over the next forty years in dealing with my old pal's concerns. I threatened him...and cajoled. Finally, out he came. Across the parking lot and into the gym we swept for a rapturous concert during which we laughted like thieves at our excellent dodge of the local cops.

At the end of the evening, during the last song, I pulled the entire crowd up onto the stage and Danny slipped into the audience and out the front door. Once again, "Phantom" Dan had made his exit. (I still get the occasional card from the old Chief of Police of Middletown wishing us well. Our histories are forever intertwined.) And that, my friends, was only the beginning.

There was the time Danny quit the band during a rough period at Max's Kansas City, explaining to me that he was leaving to fix televisions. I asked him to think about that and come back later.

Or Danny, in the band rental car, bouncing off several parked cars after a night of entertainment, smashing out the windshield with his head but saved from severe injury by the huge hard cowboy hat he bought in Texas on our last Western swing.

Or Danny, leaving a large marijuana plant on the front seat of his car in a tow away zone. The car was promptly towed. He said, "Bruce, I'm going to go down and report that it was stolen." I said, "I'm not sure that's a good idea."

Down he went and straight into the slammer without passing go.

Or Danny, the only member of the E Street Band to be physically thrown out of the Stone Pony. Considering all the money we made them, that wasn't easy to do.

Or Danny receiving and surviving a "cautionary assault" from an enraged but restrained "Big Man" Clarence Clemons while they were living together and Danny finally drove the "Big Man" over the big top.

Or Danny assisting me in removing my foot from his stereo speaker after being the only band member ever to drive me into a violent rage.

And through it all, Danny played his beautiful, soulful B3 organ for me and our love grew. And continued to grow. Life is funny like that. He was my homeboy, and great, and for that you make considerations... And he was much more tolerant of my failures than I was of his.

When Danny wasn't causing chaos, he was a sweet, talented, unassuming, unpretentious good-hearted guy who simply had an unchecked ability to make good fortune and things in general go fabulously wrong.

But beyond all of that, he also had a mountain of the right stuff. He had the heart and soul of an engineer. He learned to fly. He was always up on the latest technology and would explain it to you patiently and in enormous detail. He was always "souping" something up, his car, his stereo, his B3. When Patti joined the band, he was the most welcoming, thoughtful, kindest friend to the first woman entering our "boys club."

He loved his kids, always bragging about Jason, Harley, and Madison, and he loved his wife Maya for the new things she brought into his life.

And then there was his artistry. He was the most intuitive player I've ever seen. His style was slippery and fluid, drawn to the spaces the other musicians in the E Street Band left. He wasn't an assertive player, he was a complementary player. A true accompanist. He naturally supplied the glue that bound the band's sound together. In doing so, he created for himself a very specific style. When you hear Dan Federici, you don't hear a blanket of sound, you hear a riff, packed with energy, flying above everything else for a few moments and then gone back in the track. "Phantom" Dan Federici. Now you hear him, now you don't.

Offstage, Danny couldn't recite a lyric or a chord progression for one of my songs. Onstage, his ears opened up. He listened, he felt, he played, finding the perfect hole and placement for a chord or a flurry of notes. This style created a tremendous feeling of spontaneity in our ensemble playing.

In the studio, if I wanted to loosen up the track we were recording, I'd put Danny on it and not tell him what to play. I'd just set him loose. He brought with him the sound of the carnival, the amusements, the boardwalk, the beach, the geography of our youth and the heart and soul of the birthplace of the E Street Band.

Then we grew up. Very slowly. We stood together through a lot of trials and tribulations. Danny's response to a mistake onstage, hard times, catastrophic events was usually a shrug and a smile. Sort of an "I am but one man in a raging sea, but I'm still afloat. And we're all still here."

I watched Danny fight and conquer some tough addictions. I watched him struggle to put his life together and in the last decade when the band reunited, thrive on sitting in his seat behind that big B3, filled with life and, yes, a new maturity, passion for his job, his family and his home in the brother and sisterhood of our band.

Finally, I watched him fight his cancer without complaint and with great courage and spirit. When I asked him how things looked, he just said, "what are you going to do? I'm looking forward to tomorrow." Danny, the sunny side up fatalist. He never gave up right to the end.

A few weeks back we ended up onstage in Indianapolis for what would be the last time. Before we went on I asked him what he wanted to play and he said, "Sandy." He wanted to strap on the accordion and revisit the boardwalk of our youth during the summer nights when we'd walk along the boards with all the time in the world.

So what if we just smashed into three parked cars, it's a beautiful night! So what if we're on the lam from the entire Middletown police department, let's go take a swim! He wanted to play once more the song that is of course about the end of something wonderful and the beginning of something unknown and new.

Let's go back to the days of miracles. Pete Townshend said, "a rock and roll band is a crazy thing. You meet some people when you're a kid and unlike any other occupation in the whole world, you're stuck with them your whole life no matter who they are or what crazy things they do."

If we didn't play together, the E Street Band at this point would probably not know one another. We wouldn't be in this room together. But we do... We do play together. And every night at 8 p.m., we walk out on stage together and that, my friends, is a place where miracles occur...old and new miracles. And those you are with, in the presence of miracles, you never forget. Life does not separate you. Death does not separate you. Those you are with who create miracles for you, like Danny did for me every night, you are honored to be amongst.

Of course we all grow up and we know "it's only rock and roll"...but it's not. After a lifetime of watching a man perform his miracle for you, night after night, it feels an awful lot like love.

So today, making another one of his mysterious exits, we say farewell to Danny, "Phantom" Dan, Federici. Father, husband, my brother, my friend, my mystery, my thorn, my rose, my keyboard player, my miracle man and lifelong member in good standing of the house rockin', pants droppin', earth shockin', hard rockin', booty shakin', love makin', heart breakin', soul cryin'... and, yes, death defyin' legendary E Street Band.

(video tribute to Danny at www.BruceSpringsteen.net)

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CHANGING THE FACE OF 'DAMN'

Behind-da-scenes:

- meeting & scheming with artists to launch 'channel 9'

- about to mark another milestone with over 19 million views since launch

- passed 27,000 subscribers to our YouTube channel

- spilling our guts in an exclusive interview coming up in Forbes magazine

- too many interview requests for Donnie Hoyle, not only won't he agree - he's 'vanished'

- HORRIBLE PEOPLE #9 is NEW today - ANOTHER murder & the countdown to the champagne toast & our season finale next Monday, 4/14.

- and we're HORRIBLE in France! top featured video this a.m. on YouTube/France

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