Welcome, once again, to TVgasm Tuesday! I have some very good news and some very, very bad news for you guys. First, the good news (actually two pieces of good news): Tina Fey and Amy Poehler are for sure hosting the Golden Globes this year, so I can die happy AND Beyonce is for sure performing at the Super Bowl halftime show, which is probably the thing that will kill me. I don't really know how to break the bad news to you guys. You know when you see someone on the street, and you're like "Oh God I would hate to ever see that person having sex", and….well I guess what I'm trying to say is Hulk Hogan released a sex tape, which I can now add to the list of things I hate more than global warming and racists. Ok, try to stop barfing, and let's see what TVgasm has for us

This Week:

If there's one thing we don't need on this earth it is more celebrity offspring. At some point they have to just run out of random nouns to name their children right? Space-heater? Scissors? Are we going to keep pretend these are appropriate names, America? Click to find out which celeb is thinking about children.

Who doesn't scream "SHUT UP" at their TV while watching Bravo shows? I know I do, and so does TVgasm. Read this weeks Watch What Happens Recap because who knows Maybe Jill Zarin will finally figure out what it is she's trying to say with all that talking.

Have you heard about Lindsay Lohan's new movie "Liz & Dick"? She's scheduled to be interviewed by Barbara Walters to promote the movie, and TVgasm has the full story. I assume by "interview" it means Babs and Linds will share a few bong rips and reminisce about the 90's (the Walters-Lohan golden years)

Remember: Don't, under any circumstances, watch Hulk Hogan's sex tape. This isn't even a joke, I'm just trying to save you, Internet.