These are the kinds of people we imagine don't like Spooning:

*People who have problems with intimacy.

*People who would rather be wearing furry costumes.

*People who have problems controlling their own body heat so any additional body heat is just too overwhelming? (I actually sat next to someone on a plane once who told me this. I think he just wanted the armrest all to himself.)

*Kristen Stewart if she's sleeping with Robert Pattinson.

*People who are into forking instead.

*People who happen to be mysterious, self-made billionaires who have also experienced traumatic childhoods and channeled all of their control issues into questionable BDSM relationships yet somehow remain alluring to every female on the planet Earth.

End of rant. Just watch this.