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Today is Tuesday, and that means a lot of things: you got through the horror that is Monday; there's a new episode of Dance Moms; most importantly it means that it's TVgasm Tuesday again! So many things happened in the magical land of TV since last week that I got a little overloaded and had to spend a few hours in the fetal position eating Doritos and drinking room temperature water (and I mean that in, like, the least crazy way possible).

This week on TVgasm:

Bethennny Frankel, the scariest housewife from RHONY, got her own talk show. I'll just let that sink in for a second. TVgasm has some thoughts on Bethenny's show, and I know they'd love to share them with you. Plus, the article includes a video of the entire first episode so you can watch her get "real" (her words not mine), as many times as you want. 

Speaking of Housewives, Teresa Giudice was on The View to talk about her experience on RHONJ, and it was intense. Go read TVgasm's write up to get the scoop, and to learn about all the different ways to pronounce Teresa's last name (or she'll rip out your weave).

Finally, Bill Murray was on Letterman a couple days ago and…well I won't give it away, but his appearance confirms what I've been telling people for years: He and Tupac have SO MUCH in common.

Remember: Famous people love you as much as you love them, so keep spooning with your television no matter what society says. 

Editor's Note: In honor of Mamrie-admirer, weekend-worker, My Damn Channel writer Chris Donahue's birthday, his co-workers are celebrating:

Since it's my boy Chip's @MrChrisDonahue) birthday today, we've made a celebratory playlist for him!  He's 24 years young today and let me tell you, he's never looked better!

So sit back and rock out to some tunes in the Key of Chip.  Happy Birthday, bud!

- Dan and Dean

Thank God it's Tuesday, right, guys?! Is "TGIT" a thing? Whatever. I'm making it a thing right now; tell everyone you know. Sure, we're only two days into the week and the weekend is over 72 hours away... but the high point of your week is here: It's TVgasm Tuesday! Exclamation points!

This Week:

Do you love David Hasselhoff? Probably not because he's kind of the worst, but it's pretty funny to watch him attempt a German accent in the new online Lean Pockets ad campaign. Watch him subtly imply that the other actress has nothing going for her but her looks! So chivalrous!

Do you love Oprah? If you don't, you should because a) she's perf and b) she's the only person who actually has enough lady-balls to ask the Kardashian clan why they're famous. Go watch Oprah try to get the Kardashians to admit that they are, in fact, made mostly of plastic at this point.

Do you like toddlers? Do you like tiaras? Do you like when people ask you several questions in a row? TVgasm can help you determine if you're cut out for the world of pageants. Specifically, are you cut out for pageants starring children and their insane parents in this week's "Dear TVgasm?"

Remember: If you keep watching famous people on TV, you'll probably become one. (I'm assuming THAT'S what the Kardashians did to get famous.)

You know what, I'm just going to say it: It's hard to meet new people. It is! I get the beginning part... the handshake, then you tell each other your names, but then what!? The peeps at Answerly have my back, though (and yours, too, if maybe you're a little socially awkward sometimes)!

Kristina knows what I'm talking about, and she made a video about it! She even knows how to talk to celebrities (it turns out drooling at them is a no-no, who knew?)!

Moving to college means moving away from your friends and family, but it also means meeting an entirely new group of friends. As a college student herself, Hayley can give you tips about talking to human beings!

And when you get really good at talking to people, like really, really good at talking to people, like, good enough that they want to have some sex with you, Joe can help you out with all of the sex business!

Hey! Look at you now. Who even remembers the weird loner you once were? Now you're an outgoing, popular, social butterfly! Life lesson: watching My Damn Channel makes you popular.

Today marks another amazing (fake) holiday, LOVE NOTE DAY! In honor of Love Note Day I've decided to take some initiative and write my true love a note - and then post it on the internet for everyone to see.

Dear Mamrie,

I just wanted you to note that I love you. Note that I find everything about you wonderful, from your singing to your acting to your drinking. Note that I love it all.

Love (note),

Note (Chris)

What I'm trying to say to everyone is, you should definitely write a love note to the one you love. It's like high school all over again!