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Today marks my favorite national (fake) holiday! NATIONAL CHEESE PIZZA DAY! If you want a slice of free pizza then all you have to do is follow these simple steps.

1. Walk to your nearest/most favorite pizzeria.

2. Approach the counter with a big ole' smile.

3. Beg, cry, and plead until they give you a free slice.*

It's that simple. The only other thing left to do is shut up and eat the pizza!

*Note: This may not actually work.

Are the Olympics over yet? I'm bored!

1. Anthony Jeselnik did an interview with Splitsider, which is a great read.

2. Celeste and Jesse Forever is playing in New York City now and I couldn't be more excited. I love me some Rashida Jones!

3. Matt Romney and Rob Paul are still hitting the campaign trail hard. Expect an interview with the candidates from me this week!

4. Our friends Captain Hippo, who make our amazing show Product Displacement, made a new video (not for us) that you will have all your attention… Taken.

5. And I would say now is about the time to try and get Dave Chappelle on My Damn Channel LIVE. Make it happen.

Enjoy your week and don't ever forget that love is real (Mamrie...?). Tweet me @MrChrisDonahue

If there's one thing that Big Anthony's delivers (pun intended) other than pizza, it's wisdom. 

Nervous about a job interview?  Shut up and eat the pizza!

Twitter is down?  Shut up and eat the pizza!

Daily Grace is on vacation?  Shup up and eat the pizza!

Thanks to Tony's wisdom, I've learned to live life, one slice at a time.

Please try to figure out a way to make this your own phone number (with the appropriate area code, natch!) so that you can put it on business cards and give it to girls at parties.

Reasons:
1. You'll never forget it.
2. No one else will ever forget it.
3. You'll make an impression!
4. If you ever wear sunglasses like this, your phone number will be just wacky enough to match!
5. Because this episode of "Product Displacement" was just weird enough that you want to pay homage to it forever.

Operators are standing by!*

(*Not really. Please don't.)

WE DIDN'T DIE IN THE MAYAN APOCALYPSE!!! HURRAY!!!

1. How appropriate that the trailer for Seth Rogen's apocalypse film This Is The End premiered so close to the end of the world.

2. Reserve Channel continues releasing the most interesting interviews I've ever seen. This week with Seth Meyers and the SNL Writers.

3. CBS renewed How I Met Your Mother, which I'm catching up on now, for a ninth season.

4. Jimmy Fallon and crew created a sequel to the classic "Who's On First?" bit and nailed it.

5. Our very own Captain Hippo put out a new Christmas sketch called The Santa Clause and like everything else Captain Hippo does, it's great.

Merry Christmas. Happy Holidays. Thankful we aren't dead. Tweet me @MrChrisDonahue