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Parks and Rec returns to NBC tonight and I could not be more thrilled. So many things could happen. Will Tammy Two return this season? Burt Macklin? Janet Snakehole? THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS, not unlike the amount of bacon that Ron Swanson can eat!

Let's do three things today you guys! IN THIS ORDER!

1. Watch our Throwback Thursday video featuring Nick Offerman AND Megan Mullally!

2. Watch Retta on today's My Damn Channel LIVE!

3. Watch Parks and Recreation tonight!

Alright, break!

It's TVgasm Tuesday once again, and as a welcome gift to April, I have possibly the most news I've ever had in one post. Let's get down to business right away. I'm hearing a lot about a Finding Nemo sequel called Finding Dory. I don't know that many details, but I'm assuming the movie will be about finding someone. Possibly Dory. Stay tuned for more details. Game of Thrones premiered last night, so we all got to learn who among our friends are the undercover nerds.

Also, The Walking Dead had its season finale, which you should read about. Also did you know Taylor Swift is scheduled to guest star on New Girl in a few weeks? Listen, maybe she'll be great, and if she is you have my full permission to tell me I am a terrible person, but my prediction is it'll be rough, and she'll play some kind of deluded crazy-pants ex-girlfriend (….so like herself), and everyone will politely clap until she's done. Bravo renewed a bunch of Real Housewife series, proving once and for all that these women will never die and these shows will run forever. Let's see what TVgasm has...

This Week:

For a few weeks now there have been rumors floating around about Jimmy Fallon taking over Jay Leno's late night spot, and finally the two made a video together addressing the rumors (in the best way possible obviously). I mean, I'm a big fan of Jimmy Fallon because of this moment, but we'll see what happens.

Americas Most Wanted has been on for…my entire life I'm pretty sure, so when I heard it was canceled I was a little relieved to be honest. I mean it was on the Lifetime Network, the place where TV shows go to die, and are reborn into TV movie gems like Cyberbully, starring Emily Osment. 

FX is starting a new network called FXX (which I thought was supposed to be like FX for women, like some kind of chromosome joke, but apparently not), and a bunch of shows are moving exclusively over to that network! Click to find out which ones!

Remember: If you want to live forever, follow the Real Housewives diet of hard alcohol, Diet Coke, and meanness.

Tweet me the nickname you're trying to make happen for yourself @Sam_the_stone

There are few things that men seem to enjoy more than coming together during the football season to compile fake rosters of real athletes whom they will never know or meet and pretend that they are head coaches of fake teams made up of said players that they will compulsively monitor on computers and smart phones while competing against one another for the right to call themselves King of a pretend world that's based on the real-life doings of millionaires. 

It's what being a football fan is all about for half a year: playing pretend NFL.

And you know who's awesome at playing pretend NFL?  Me.  4-1 in my league right now-- first place in my division, cheech.  But you know who's really good at playing pretend pretend NFL?  The cast of The League, which has its season premiere tonight at 10:30 on FX.  

Now in it's fourth season, The League has been consistently funny since it kicked-off its first season in 2009.  But no one's surprised that it's a hilarious show since the cast includes Mark Duplass, Nick Kroll, Jon Lajoie, Paul Scheer, Katie Aselton and My Damn Channel's own bad daddy, Steve Rannazzisi.

Steve has been lighting it up in our original web series Daddy Knows Best, playing an absent-minded father who, among other things, gets tased, eats weed brownies, and takes his young son to a strip club.  Steve infuses Daddy Knows Best with the same zany, improvisational humor that has made The League such a hit.   So sit back and watch the ENTIRE SEASON OF DADDY KNOWS BEST before enjoying The League's premiere tonight.

@DannyMoney