OH YEAH, OH YEAH! Here we go, everybody! HERE WE GO!
It's time to smush-- if she's DTF. It's time to beat the beat at Karma. It's t-shirt time cuz the cabs are here. It's gym time, it's tanning time and it's laundry time... because GTL is how we DO. It's time for another season of the Jersey Shore. Time to head back to the land of "juicehead gorillas" and "meatballs" for one more summer, since this will be the final season of the show. So what can we look forward to this season?
Well, Snooki is pregnant, so I'm anxious to see how she handles not being able to get absolutely smashed every hour of every day. This also makes me wonder what Deena will do without her meatball-in-crime. And will Ryder make an appearance and get it in with Pauly D or Vinny?
The Situation acted like a real baby all of last season; personally, I thought his antics on seasons 1-3 were priceless, hilarious stuff, so I'm hoping he gets back to that, instead of continuing to act like the sniveling weasel he has become. He's done some time in rehab, so maybe that means we'll see a better, sharper Mike.
Vinny turned me off last season when he had a nervous breakdown and had to go home and get a stupid tattoo across his chest; it certainly must be really tough doing nothing all day and partying every night. Hopefully the perennially awesome Pauly D can make sure his best bro is in good spirits throughout the summer.
And then of course we're all wondering what versions of Sammi and Ronnie we will see this season. Will we see the rare, "cool-and-composed" couple or the "out-of-control-ridiculous-roid-raged-sweetest-bitch-you-will-ever-meet" couple that have torn through five seasons?
I hope JWoww still has big boobs.
So, there it is. Those are my thoughts. I'm looking forward to some good times, though a sober Snooki is almost too much for me to bear. Jionni, why didn't you just wear a condom so I could continue to see the shit-show that is Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi!? WHY?!!?!
Ok, I'm out-- CABS AH HEAH!!!!!!!!!!