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  • The Night Feed

    Ten Great Things About Thanksgiving

    Well, it’s almost here. Thanksgiving is really, really soon, you guys. To celebrate, I made a list of the best things about Thanksgiving. I’d like to share it with you now.


    10. Folksy holiday travel pieces on NPR. On the one hand, it’s like, we get it, traffic is crazy, but they’re kind of cozy and comfortable in that they happen every year and they’re sort of universally relatable.


    9. Martellini’s Sparkling Apple Cider. I’m technically allowed to drink alcohol now, but why would I ever want to drink anything but cider?


    8. Referring to pumpkin pie as “punkin’ pie” to be funny, but also old-timey and cute.


    7. Remembering all your family’s wacky Thanksgiving stories, like the time my weird cousins and their parents got in a massive, knock-down-drag-out fight over whether Disney’s Brother Bear was a good movie.


    6. Stuffing. ‘Nuff said.


    5. Christmas music on the radio, because even if you’ve already been wearing out your holiday playlist for a month on Spotify, who cares, it’s officially Christmas music season!!!


    4. Watching the Macy’s Parade while eating some sort of yummy breakfast food your mom made (cinnamon rolls!) and getting a head start on that sweet, sweet sparkling cider consumption.


    3. The Charlie Brown balloon. He’ll never kick that football, will he?


    2. Spending the day with your family and/or chosen family, if you’re lucky enough to do so.


    1.     Third Leftovers, which is where you just fill a bowl with mashed potatoes, put a spoonful of everything else on top, and smash it all in your mouth at once while watching Miracle on 34th Street/It’s a Wonderful Life/Elf.


    Happy T. Gives, everybody!

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  • The Night Feed

    Top Ten Candy Picks!

    What did you do with your hurricane? I can tell you what I did: I made a video counting down my Top Ten Candy Picks for HALLOWEEN!

    Are you so excited to trick or treat tonight? You should dress up like Batman or whatever! Watch my new video, it's a spooktacular day for HALLOWEEN!

    Seriously though guys, be safe out there and watch my video! It's at the bottom of this post! And make sure you don't get any razorblades in your candy!

    If you think you have better candy picks than the ones in my video prove it by tweeting at me, Internet! @MrChrisDonhaue



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  • 11 Points

    11 Future Inventions We Want Most

    Remember all of those things that movies/books/tv shows promise us in the future?

    Food replicators. Hoverboards. Rosie The Robots. Terminators. Hunger Games.*

    Out of all the zillions of things that science fiction writers have promised us, our friends at 11 Points have decided to countdown which of those fantastic futuristic things we want most.

    We agree with everything except number 11. Because... seriously, you guys?! SERIOUSLY?!

    Also featuring special guest Kyle Anderson of Nerdist and Modern Primate!

    *See what I did there? Hunger Games references FOREVER.


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  • The Night Feed

    Set List


    It seems to be de rigueur these days to improvise your stand up.  I've posted about Eric Andre developing comedy through improvisation, and Todd Barry recently released a film via Louis C.K. called "Todd Barry: The Crowd Work Tour", which was pretty damn funny.


    Anyways, I'm a big fan of this kind of stand up, and it was cool to discover Set List.  Check it out if you like seeing funny people just do stuff.


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  • The Night Feed

    Things You Should Never Say To Someone Working Retail Over The Holidays

    Well, it’s November, which means one thing: the holidays are on the horizon. Errbody be buying presents, and while that might be good for the economy, it’s hell on the underpaid retail employees who have to deal with hordes of grumpy, dissatisfied customers. It’s the season of peace on earth and goodwill toward men, unless you work at the Apple Store – in which case, screw you.

    In order to help you, Gentle Reader, avoid being a total douchebag to retail associates this season, I have compiled a collection of quotes you should do your best to scrub from your vocabulary. Remember, you can dump your entire coin jar into the Salvation Army bucket, but that act of goodwill is completely canceled out by any of these sentences:  

    1. “Do you have any more in the back?”

    No, we don’t, and we probably don’t have time to go check, so unless this is something you desperately need – i.e., not a Monster High doll or a blush palette – you should probably just check online or go elsewhere.

    2. “Well, can you just go check the back?”

    Inside tip: when you tell your sales associate to “go check in the back,” they walk into the stockroom and just chat with their coworkers for about thirty seconds. Because there are never any more in the back.

    3. “What do you mean, you don’t have any more [insert Black Friday doorbuster here]?! I gave up my sleep for this?”

    You really do not want to say this to someone whose store opened at 8pm on Thanksgiving in order to sell more flatscreen TVs. Seriously, you do not want to say this. If you have any shred of human decency, you will not even think these words.

    4. “It doesn’t scan? Must be free, then!”

    The first time your cashier heard this “joke,” they laughed so hard they fell off their dinosaur.

    5. Any reference to how crazy the mall parking lot is.

    There are actually malls that require their employees to park over a mile away as to free up as many parking spaces for customers as possible. This is possibly the worst thing I’ve ever heard and I wish I were making it up but I am not.

    Got any retail rants for me? Tweet me at @lizbelsky to share.

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  • Wainy Days

    Be An Angel Today!

    Are you aware that today's (fake) national holiday is Be An Angel Day? Well, it is! So be an angel (like Henry and Mike), and treat people with the respect and compassion they need.

    For example:

    How's life guys? Pretty lame, huh? You know what? It's never going to get any better. It's always going to be a roller coaster of good AND bad times, so deal with it. You know what you can do to make it better for yourself and everyone around you? BE AN ANGEL!!! 

    Life Tip from Chris Donahue: Be An Angel Every Day!

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  • TVGasm

    TVGASM TUESDAY

    I hope you've fully digested from your Thanksgiving dinner(which you probably Instagrammmed the shit out of), because you're about to get a giant helping of TVgasm Tuesday! Obviously the first thing we have to talk about it the upcoming Beyonce movie. I think it's safe to say that the entire world is not ready for that jelly. I always get a little bummed out after talking about Beyonce; how can I ever compare? I'll probably just look at this Worst Dressed List to make myself feel better, and of course check out TVgasm


    This week:


    We've all been waiting for weeks, and it finally happened: Lindsay Lohan's "Liz & Dick" finally premiered on Lifetime. Shockingly it was pretty terrible, and everyone watched it. TVgasm has the scoop on all things "Liz & Dick"


    Confession time: I've never seen Basketball Wives. I know, I know, it's ridiculous, and I should be ashamed. As I understand it, the show's about women married to basketball players, and not women married to basketballs, as I originally thought. Why in the world would these women ever need more money? TVgasm has the full story.


    Anyone who stays up every Saturday for SNL will know Stefon, Weekend Update's club correspondent played by Bill Hader who always seems like he's on some kind of amphetamine. Click to watch an Interview with Hader all about his writing process and development with Stefon!



    Remember: People will watch almost anything on Lifetime, especially if the word Dick is in the title.

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  • Daily Grace

    Let's Talk About Tim

    Can we talk about Grace's brother Tim for a minute and how much we love him?

    Seriously. How adorable is he? Not only is he a raging botanist, he is almost as hilarious as his sister.

    For example: He decided to re-write The Hunger Games famous cave scene for you, and used cut-out images taped to straws as puppets.

    HE CUT OUT IMAGES TAPED TO STRAWS AS PUPPETS. And he knows what anemone look like if you slice one. And he's related to Grace. And he makes us laugh. And... well, I mean... don't you think he's adorable?

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